Did We Need to Go There

My blog has never been one for controversy. I leave controversy to many face-to-face communications. Body language can be read and understood, as can eye movement, facial expressions, tone. Tone is often hard to communicate in writing. One must be a skilled author to have the finesse to emit tone in the conversation. So controversy as I said is left to the true verbal arena so as not to encounter miscommunications or to misunderstand.

So my tone is about to go to a beaten path NEVER taken before. EVER. I will probably lose blog followers and I am deeply sorry. I will not yield nor apologize for my personal life, my personal decisions, something that completely affects me, with the exception of my husband as he was a very intricate part of my life in this decision.


Once upon a Thanksgiving in 2009 a young woman who spent two days prepping, cleaning, cooking and baking, not to mention caring for her three children. Might I add, two of which are twins in case you are just tuning into the Fish Film @ 11, and I work a full-time job, a real. full time job. Not just the job of mom, you see that is my first job, my real job is my third job, my second job is wife, and my fourth job is business owner. So you see I truly have FOUR FULL time jobs....ah hell five if you add all the housework. So back to it, I was cleaning up after a much enjoyed pie hole stuffing event. Family was gathered on my couch, every seat taken,  reading Black Friday ads, friends were conversing, laughs shared abound. As the crowd began to simmer and disperse I thought I need to call my dear friend who so lovingly called to share in her thanks and love on this day. But in addition to the love to be shared was the hate that this ugly world can bring. Not hate by my friend, the hate of strangers, the hate of those who put up a loving facade to avoid confrontation, the hate spewed behind anonymity to win out in some delusional war of words.

Please be advised that the images you are about to see are repulsive, obscene, disgusting, and horrid. All directed AT ME. I debated on posting these images and by rehashing information I so prayed to disappear, but the glutton in me took pictures of the proof of hate generated by people.

For privacy reasons the images were removed and can only be viewed by invitation only. 

As I said. I apologize for any and ALL of you to read this ugliness. I was so physically ill on Thursday I could barely sleep. I was shaking, I was borderline inconsolable. My husband, bless his heart, reassured me to ignore this. It would go away. It did not. The pain did not go away. These people have NOT. GONE. AWAY! The Twitter account STILL EXISTS!!! I thought the account had been deleted, however, I was wrong and hatred breeds and multiplies and yet another account can be created in anonymity so as to further the cause of hatred.

Now here is my beef. I have no problem with someone gossiping at or about me. Whatever, sticks and stones okay. But a FULL ON CHARACTER ASSASSINATION will make this Lionesses blood boil! My sweet little guppy fish exterior will molt into the full on lion bitch I am! What else....NO ONE. I do stress NO ONE has any of this information in the blogging community...oh wait. With the single exception of my sister.

YES. You know her. Brittany Greer. Brittany Hudson Greer over @ The Greer 5.

My flesh and blood. I had attempted to try to keep this between the family. A family feud that she clearly took too far in divulging my personal information to sheer strangers for their personal use to attack me. To belittle, to judge, to bring me shame, to destroy my character, to inflict pain, I can go on and on. Clearly a reprimandable offense correct? One might think considering that a third party went so far as to assassinate my good character, to attempt to destroy my friendships, my networkings, or maybe because the cretin who created this account thought it may be funny to bring pain to someone such as me. If you believe in this.....keep on being a subscriber to your community that is "generously" run and operated by Mom Dot. Because my information seems to have been so "generously" shared and detailed...although I will state that the details in these tweets are clearly misinformed, out of time line, and clearly NONE OF ANYONE'S FUCKING BUSINESS. I also encourage you to continue to be a member of a community that does love to breed controversy as my personal life so clearly became a hot topic in a forum for enjoyment. Or hell maybe just in an email but regardless, the two involved ARE members, very active members of that community. Which further suggests that the negative behavior of public humiliation, belittling and degradation is A FUCKING OKAY with these people. I would love to publicly humiliate...man...I would be such a big girl to do that.

To post pictures of random strangers and discuss their situations may they be unfortunate with other random strangers and call it "fun" or "comedic" hell albeit fucking hysterical right...just a joke.

FUCK YOU and you know who you are. Are those tweets a fucking joke to any of you? If so....I dare you to leave me your FULL NAME to leave up for public humiliation. I also dare.....no....I challenge the lowly individual who so PROUDLY created this account with the original intentions of bashing MY friend Kristin, whether you like her or not, who then decided to turn the object of their desire to me...I CHALLENGE you to come to my blog and apologize to me. Furthermore I CHALLENGE the cretin and or CRETINS who acted in such a distasteful, vulgar, unbecoming, and plebian manner to PUBLICLY APOLOGIZE to myself and Kristin on Twitter and on a blog post that shall stay posted for AN ENTIRE WEEK. To allow those who read it to show their disdain to you. To show you how much of an uncouthful coward you were and are for hiding behind anonymity, your keyboard, and indecency. I also challenge Miss "I am the Community and this is my blog" so shoot me an email...we'll discuss the details like adults.

Working Hard for My Money

Can you hear Donna Summers? I can. Brings me back to the 80s. So I read this post and maybe some of you did too about getting paid to blog. Now before I get hit with tomatoes and you all decide to leave nasty comments that I will leave for everyone to see....and guess what...I don't respond with nastiness...so comment away. Why do people feel some entitlement to be paid to blog? I mean I can understand if you are hired by a company i.e. Mattel, DeVry Institute, Daimler Chrysler, HBO Films, etc then I can see a paycheck being yielded for services DELIVERED. You, as a writer for aforementioned company could yield a paycheck.

But blogging because you are a stay at home mom who originally started out as just a stay at home mom who blogged about life as a stay at home mom who is now a semi-interesting blog that does some product reviews and did some giveaways in the past does not entitle you to be paid. Why? Let me explain.

You are a mom. That is a job right? Yup. Where is the effing money for that job? Oh, you mean you don't get paid to do that job like the Nanny, the babysitter, the daycare service that watches your child when you actually go to a JOB that pays you a check? Or how about that maid? Do you get $180 a month to clean your own house? Nope. Or better yet, how about the lawn service....are you being paid the same amount as (phonetic for you here) Hey Seuss (Jesus) to mow the lawn, rake the leaves? Right.  You see you got into blogging as an outlet, as most did.

An outlet to share angst, pain, sorrow, frustration, pain, and all the in between of being a mom. So your blog became popular because women, men, and the like enjoyed your readings, maybe they still do enjoy your readings, in fact maybe your posts resonated with the audience. Then one day PR approached you. A simple, hey would you try this out, we will send it to you for free and you write about it. Okay. No harm, plus its a free product. Really, who would turn down free schtuff? Heck my family is known for free schtuff, ask my sister Brittany Greer, my step-dad, his motto for the last 20 years "If It's Free It's for Me." You take said product, try it out, see if you like it, family likes it. You tell your family and friends and then you blog about it. Mission accomplished. I like some products and some I do not...I say so...my kids say so....or if we like the product but do not like features...we say so about that too. YOU SAY SO.

When did that become a paying job? Like motherhood? Or better yet I actually went to the panel. Someone who knows diddly shit about blogging, social media, product reviews, I went to the husband. I asked him.

"What do you think about bloggers who do product reviews suggesting or even going as far as demanding and asking for pay for "time and services" to review a product?" Guess what he said.....

"So what, they are whoring out their blog for cash? They feel they have some entitlement because PR ASK'S, yes ASK'S them to review a product? Do they keep the product too?" I nod in acceptance. "Sounds to me that is more prostitution....that would be like charging your husband for a handjob when you don't feel like telling him no...you aren't in the mood or charging him hourly rates for the few seconds he lasts in bed when you should have told him NO."

From the mouth of a man. Who has nothing to do with blogging. Who really, doesn't know all the in's and out's of my blogging, my product reviews, social media, etc, etc. He just sees that I am a happier person, that I am not working my ass to the bone everyday in an office, that I am home with our kids. I blog to share my experiences as a mom, woman, wife, inner child, and human out of my head and I would rather type it because thank the heavens for Bill Gates and freaking spell check because my handwriting would be chicken scratch in a journal. He sees that blogging has given me an outlet besides our awesome therapist and besides arguing with him. I go blog because I like to, and no one has to pay me to do this job.

If I get some products along the way that my kids or family enjoy and hey some PR company gets some piddly exposure on my blog for it...so be it. Whatever. They get the same exposure by hiring my granny to pass out "All Natural TAY COES, please Come try some TAY COES, ALL NATURAL, 100% NATURAL" at the frozen food aisle of Costco. Only granny doesn't get to take home and eat those TAY COES, I do.

I don't need my blog to tell me I have self worth. I don't need bloggy or PR windbags to justify my worth or influence. I don't need numbers. Stats. Followers. Minions, sheep, or a fracking forum and online community to tell me about my self worth.

Why? Because I am a 31 year old woman, wife, mother. I put myself through college while married, raising one, birthing twins during a class, thus raising three all while going to COLLEGE. I wasn't awarded the luxury of college right after high school or wealthy parents. I also worked full time since I was 14, then from my home as a successful loan consultant at the age of 25. I have worked for multi-million dollar franchises and Fortune 500 companies. I have been a manager before most ass hats were even figuring out their college major (yes at 20 I was a manager). I am beautiful, snarky, have an IQ that would make the temperature of a hot, July, Arizona summer cry. I also have a heart of gold, am loyal, friendly and genuine. I have friends in REAL LIFE and friends online, and guess what. THEY COULD CARELESS  what my stats are, my followers, my tweets.

No one pays or paid me to be a mom. I made a CHOICE! I made a choice to become a mother. Just like I made a CHOICE to blog, I made a CHOICE to do product reviews, giveaways, and promotions, PR doesn't shove anything down my throat. In fact a lot ask....and I kindly say...not at this time...or that is not right for my family...just like PR says to bloggers who have approached them....See how this is a two way street. I choose to do it, because I enjoy it. Just like I enjoy being a mother. So if you want to pay me for being a mom....I think I may have resentment, just like other paying jobs I have had in the past. If you want to pay me to blog....I hope the payment is for a topic or product I like...because I only speak the truth on every level. The jobs I love and enjoy are the ones I don't have to yield a paycheck, but if I get something out of it, like a product or even a PRODUCTIVE child and adult who has their own self worth....I can sleep at night. Thank you, Good Day.